What is going on everyone!!
Let’s just be honest. Sometimes, the process is very difficult. Lately, I have been frustrated YET AGAIN with not being where I want to be. Certain things in my life are progressing and moves are being made, but in other areas, I just want to ‘arrive’. I get so frustrated because I am honestly selfish and prideful. I honestly feel like I deserve where I want to be, and when that is not the reality, it drives me nuts. Although I write good stuff about perspective, I will totally forget about it. Not this time. I was reminded in a conversation with my dad that even “progress in process is okay. The real way you know how effective your writing is is when you are going through the valley, and you read your own advice and it works.” This life isn’t about just posting positive words and positive vibes. It is a legit fight every single day for faith, sanity, and motivation.
Every day I wake up, I can’t have the mentality that I have made it. I will never make it. I just get so frustrated because of my selfish ambition. In the moment, I just want to have a bigger platform for writing and speaking, if I am honest. But deeper than that, I just desire for people to be impacted and to see Jesus, and I feel small or that I am not making a difference sometimes. That is when it is so clutch to have people who kick your butt and encourage you that you are on the right path. This is really just an honest post, nothing really geared to be motivational. Honesty can be the best motivator sometimes. It is so important to just give God your motives and be honest with those motives, and allow Him to align your motives to His heart. Peace comes from being in a place of knowing that you are on a good road, even when things do not show themselves to be perfect.
Ultimately, this is just a collection of random thoughts. I hope they help someone, even if it is just being able to relate.
Much Love,
Ryan W.
